Now that I have found some semblance of normalcy in post-graduate life, I thought it would be nice to try and write about what has been going on. As I mentioned in the previous post, my mental/emotional/spiritual state went through some major changes throughout college. I have to admit that even though there seemed to be more downs than ups, something truly clicked at the beginning of my senior year semester. In the “aftermath” of graduation, I feel like I lost too much of that peaceful bliss and I have been trying to regain that feeling. Life is truly a funny thing sometimes-when you are wallowing around in confusion and depression, nothing seems to make sense or bring you peace, even though you KNOW what it truly takes to sustain you. You begin to second guess your dreams, your goals, your ambitions….
It is so important for us to write down our dreams and goals and constantly remind ourselves of what we are trying to work toward. There are too many methods of accomplishing this from Tim Ferriss’s Dreamlining worksheet to Stephen Covey’s Mission Statement process (Google ‘em up!) Unfortunately, getting a mental or spiritual hold on our deepest dreams and goals is only the first step in a lifelong process.
I’ve been addicted to this book I picked up the other day…I believe it is called Finding Your North Star by Martha Beck. Martha has been throwing me some Oprah “a-ha” moments left and right with this book. I think the most valuable thing I have taken away thus far is the concept of essential self and social self. For those of us non-psych majors, that is just referring to your “natural, deep gut feeling tendencies” vs your “I have to fit in with other people, what does society think?” urges. If you are like me, these two “selves” are almost never in harmony. How many times have you wanted to test your Chewbacca voice at the last party you were at, but stifled the urge because of what people might think about you? Or what about the time you wanted to find Rachel Ray and tell her where she could put that EVOO (or whatever the hell she talks about) but held back because of getting a citation from the law for stalking?
I’m sure there are a million and one ways to describe this constant battle between what we really want and what we think we should want to make society a happy camper. Obviously, stalking Rachel Ray would not be a good idea under any circumstance, so following the rules to a reasonable degree is always a good idea. Give to Ceasar what is Ceasar’s.
Butttt….
What happens when there is an unhealthy balance between your purpose/dreams/ambitions (the stuff inside) and your actions/what society sees (the stuff on the outside)?? There are also a million ways to describe this phenomenon from hypocrisy to depression. The process of moving from dreams or inner desires to reality or what society sees is so simple, yet so difficult. Nonetheless, it is an absolutely essential process.
I encourage you to take some time to think about your deepest dreams and desires and then compare that to the things you are doing on a day-to-day basis. My newfound “religion” is a much more holistic process as I mentioned earlier. I see God and spiritual beauty in just about everything that I do. Now, I am slowly making the transition to integrating my spiritual self with my social self.
Have you been secretly dreaming about swimming with the dolphins at Sea World and seeing how they respond to your Chewbacca growl? Start that dreams-to-reality process! Get a library book about dolphins. Talk to your neighbor about Sea World. Watch Flipper re-runs with your kids. Go over your grocery list to make sure you’re preparing your body to swim with those dolphins. Make sure that you are living in harmony with your deepest spiritual purposes, even if it’s as simple as a Sea World run.
You have the opportunity to influence so many people, in my opinion.